Sister & her BFF gifted me with a tank top that says "Excuse me, could you give me a hand...or at least a couple of fingers?" Apparently they had gone "specialty" shopping and couldn't resist. Sister claims I must wear it around the house but I don't think it would go over very well with our mother (actually, I'd probably be asked to explain what it meant. Augh!).

When we were dating, my husband gave me a t-shirt that said, "S&M means never having to say you're sorry." My mother found it and asked what it meant. I think I uttered the longest "ummmmmmm" of my life.